For two days, I've tried to decide on which language this blog should be written in. Then I made my decision: it would be whichever I’d like. That means, in three languages, sometimes at the same time, I'll try to write something in this space of mine - Turkish, English, and German. For the expression of some instants, of some moments, is too precious to be let blurred due to any loss in translation.Writing a blog, writing anything to publish, has been a project that I had postponed for a long time. I've always wondered why people write a blog that nobody but the blogger would give any shit about indeed. I could not reconcile myself to the thought of writing a blog where I would share my thoughts or feelings. But then I realized that I have already had a facebook and a twitter account where I have already written statuses, uploaded cheesy photos, shared some links that actually nobody but I give any shit about. Why do we have so many 'personalized' spaces connecting us to others through a network system. That's all because of our 'everlasting' desire to be recognized, the desire for the recognition of our existence. It's not, in fact, something to be ashamed of since all our actions and measures already have this motto.
In order to feel our existence, someone else other than us has to feel our existence in the first place and make us aware of that they recognize that existence of ours. Otherwise, the existence felt by the self alone does not mean so much to us as it would become a schizoid situation. If nobody but you can feel that you exist, then you don't exist in 'real'. In fact, the more we hide ourselves, or a part of ourselves, from other people, the more we lose the sense of our, or of that part of our, existence. That's why people write books, make some discoveries and make them public with their names; that's why some people make music and give concerts; some make demonstrations in order to be politically recognized; some kill serially as a way to leave a signature; some simply cry to be heard; or some get promiscuous to have even an instantaneous meaning for someone else. Of course, there are some other ways to make one feel his/her own existence on one’s own; like, bungee-jumping, which would pump up one's adrenaline that help you to feel the existence of your body, only through that human beings can be alive in physical term. Yet, it's a short-term way of feeling that you're alive since the effect of adrenaline does not last so long as you can feel it till death, or after death :O).
The most superficial explanation of that is becoming a couple and having a child maybe. The concept of family - doesn't matter whether in the form of an institution, or in that of 'love-cage' - evokes the very evidence of one's existence by producing numerous frames of happy pictures, and child(ren) as a genetic and social proof; by building a home (both literally and figuratively); by possessing properties and rights to pass on to the next generation - all of which would be the very evidence of one's existence even after his/her death.
All that rush around us (some call it 'life' :P) and those newly developed and developing network systems connecting us and the spaces we created and think as a piece, or a form, of us serve to fulfill only one task: to fulfill the desires of 'existence' in 'real'. Nonetheless, this bullshitting above is not a new discovery I present but a legitimization for my future 'blogging'.